Sleeping with a Cold

Andrew has been sick with a cold for about a week now. He has a deep cough and a very runny nose. Thursday, Friday, and Saturday he would only sleep if he was being held while Patrick or I were holding him sitting upright. Since Patrick works I did the night holding, Thursday, Friday and Saturday from about 4 am on. Needless to say by Saturday morning all of us were sick. I have learned that a 9 month old can have a cold and still be just as active as ever, while adults on the other hand are miserable and don't have much energy. So during a two day period Andrew had pulled piles of books off the bookcases, torn up toilet paper around the apartment, scattered his toys everywhere, and pulled many of the pots, pans, and Tupperware containers out of the kitchen cupboards. Meanwhile, Patrick and I just let him, only stopping him if he could possibly get hurt. Now that we are starting to feel better, I wonder where I am going to get the motivation to clean.

Last night as I was going to bed, I looked down at the navy blue shirt I was wearing and saw it had been covered with snot stains from Andrew rubbing his face across my chest as he got comfortable enough to sleep. It was also still slightly damp from his sweaty little head. I thought back to nine months ago when we brought him home and how he would only sleep on our chests. He was so small and now his arms wrap around my arms, his head lies on my shoulders, his legs wrap around my hips or hang down almost touching my knees. He rubs my arm or face usually gently and sort of sings/hums along with me as I sing him to sleep. I found myself, though tired, enjoying holding him at night, as I realize that he will only continue to get bigger and in time holding and sleeping with him on my chest will no longer be possible.

I love being a mom. I love watching his personality develop as he plays with me. This past week he has been very playful. Taking his spoon while I am feeding him, turning his body and holding the spoon over the edge of the high chair as if he was going to drop it. Then he looks at me and laughs, and I tug at the spoon to get it back from him. I would give him another bite and he takes the spoon, turns and laughs, and holds the spoon over the edge. We played this almost his whole feeding. He also loves to take my phone, laugh as he raises it to his mouth wide open, and then pauses for me to say no and move the phone away from his mouth. He then starts over, occasionally chewing and slobbering on my phone a bit, before I pull it away.

If the bathroom door gets left open he will crawl to the door and often wait until I notice and follow after him as he laughs and crawls in. He growls as he chases his basketball, and makes car noises with everything that has wheels. He hears the keys at the door and will stop whatever he is doing and head to the door to greet his Dad with a smile.

He kisses me with his mouth wide open. Hits at my breasts when he wants to nurse and face plants into my chest. He puts his fingers in my mouth and when possible my nose while he is nursing, then smiles(still nursing) when I take his hand and kiss it. He climbs up my legs to stand and holds on while I am doing dishes or cooking. He is even standing in his high chair when ever possible, which scares me.

It amazes me how independent and strong minded/willed he is getting and how quick he is. I am so grateful that Patrick has made it possible for me to stay home and care for Andrew as he grows. I won't pretend that it is easy, that I never feel unappreciated or like I should be working toward a career of some sort. I know very few moms, if any, who have never felt those down feelings, but I find those feelings slip away with every slobbery kiss, and big smile Andrew gives me, even his sad faces as he crawls on his hands and feet like a little bear cub toward me for comfort help me to realize that there is no job in the world that would or could make me give up this time I have to be "just" Andy's mom, and Patrick's wife. I love them both so much. I write this so that I don't forget to appreciate every moment I have with them.